Suggestion

[switchblade romance]

Having a way to see what members are online and those are not online.

[imported_shiola]

If you look at the bottom of the forum home page it'll tell you which members are online. You can probably never see anyone because we're like highly paranoid and scared Meerkats, whenever someone else appears we run and hide and pretend we're looking at more important websites like http://www.gmhg.org

[switchblade romance]

I don't see where it lists the members that are online.

[imported_shiola]

Probably because no-one is online. I have seen it work though....honest guv.

[switchblade romance]

When I am online it doesn't show up.

[imported_shiola]

Yeah, it doesn't show myself either.

[dontpanic]

It used to show. Now it does not. Maybe it felt neglected during the "smileys" incident and ran off to find a new home on some boring guy's blog? Or not.

[imported_shiola]

I sometimes see someone on...I think this thing is developing a mind of it's own. Sometimes it shows other people, sometimes it kicks DP off, sometimes it won't load a page.....

Brilliant. Now we have to do whatever 'The Forum' wants us to do.

At least I'm relieved of all responsibility now. switchblade romance - take up your complaint with The Machine.

[Far King Great]

Please enlighten me what was the "smiley" incident?

[imported_shiola]

I was being extremely girlie one day and decided to add some more smilies to the forum - the end result was that the whole forum crashed and died for nearly a week.

I am currently trying to resist anymore girlie actions such as adding more smilies, putting flowers everywhere or changing the color scheme from Blue/Green to Pink/Lilac.

[poppet]

Did you just spell colour as color????

Time to come home my friend!

[imported_shiola]

FUCK!!!!!!!!! You're right, not only am I turning girlie, but I'm also becoming Americanised (notice I spelt that with an 'S', not a 'Z').

Get those battered Mars bars at the ready Poppet, it's time I went to Scotland. Did I mention I went to Scotland for the first time when I went back to Blighty during the summer? I flew to Glasgow for the weekend for my mates wedding, whereabouts are you anyway?

Switch - back to the main subject in hand, I just noticed Dave posted a reply whilst I was online and the damn forum never highlighted his prescence so I think you're right that there's no notification. I'm now going to hunt down some kind of mod to add to the forum so we can all see who's online.

[poppet]

One deep-fried Mars bar coming up!!! Would you like a bottle of Irn-Bru too?


Wow, a wedding in Glasgow huh? You could've told me, I'd have gladly turned up to laugh at your legs in a kilt :P

I actually live outside of Glasgow now, I moved about 3 years ago, but apart from that I lived all my life north of the city near Bishopbriggs. So where was the wedding you went to and was it any good?

[imported_shiola]

I couldn't remember, but now I've looked on the map I can tell you it was a little town called 'Buchlyvie' about 15 miles north of Glasgow. We stayed in a really nice country house outside the town, also went to Loch Lomond one afternoon.

Didn't wear a kilt as we were all English....but secretly I wanted too ;)

[dontpanic]

That's hilarious. America sucks another one in.

It would be great if we could leave posts with sound - then ay cud git all y'all tokin' laak me.






......secretly, i got a wee shiver up my spine when poppet mentioned our dear shiola in a kilt. :shock:

[poppet]

DP got a shiver!!!!!!!! :twisted: ooo-er!!!


C'mon Shiola, mock up a pic of you in a kilt!! Do it for the girls!!!! :wink:

[Far King Great]

Dave? Who is dave?

[dontpanic]

You know, if you are shy you could get a mate to take a pic of you from the waist-down only so we could picture the kilt. :shock:

**crosses fingers for a brief gust of wind**

[imported_shiola]

Hey girls, calm down. I didn't know the mere mention of kilts could get a group of ladies so flustered.

Davey is DaveyTaylor. Ask him nicely and he'll post a hello to you, ask him rudely and he'll tear your cunting head off.

DaveyTaylor in a kilt AND in a Sharon Stone 'Basic Instinct' pose - that's what the crowd really wants.

[poppet]

Nice try, but read my lips..WE WANT A PIC OF YOU IN A KILT!

[imported_shiola]

Completely changing the subject....so it's back on topic....

You may have noticed that I've added some more 'Who's Online' type things. There's a link at the top of every page so you can who is online and where they are. Every user also has a 'Status:' by their avatar....and there's a personalised welcome on the forum home page....it is heartfelt and comes loaded with love.....seriously, it does.

I'm also hunting down a couple of other mods to add.

[daveytaylor]

Davey is DaveyTaylor. Ask him nicely and he'll post a hello to you, ask him rudely and he'll tear your cunting head off.

FUCK OFF!

I mean, Hello... I always get those two mixed up.

DaveyTaylor in a kilt AND in a Sharon Stone 'Basic Instinct' pose - that's what the crowd really wants.

You mean that's what you want. Admit it, a quick and tasteful glance at my purple headed womb broom would send you into sexual ectasy.

[poppet]

I really like the little Online thingy well done, though to be truthful I don't really know what I'll do with it cos it's not like we all chat. But still, it's nice to know there's life out there :)

[imported_shiola]

Yeah, what was happening on March 29th this year though?!! It went mental all of a sudden.

[poppet]

sorry you've lost me.

[dontpanic]

Apparently a nut house let it's patients out for a day pass that day and they all went online and came here. Either that or it was "Introduction to the Computer" day at Attica Prison.

Davey. Davey, Davey, Davey. Womb Broom? I've never heard that. Now, I feel a bit unclean. Shit, man! Unclean!

[imported_shiola]

His womb broom is there to sweep up your womb room.

[dontpanic]

Unclean!

[poppet]

Maybe Daveys pubes are on the wrong end of his willy :wink:

[daveytaylor]

Maybe Daveys pubes are on the wrong end of his willy :wink:

Maybe Davey's pubes are hiding his willy. The wife went down on me the other night and said, "Come on, have a piss and give me a clue."

[imported_shiola]

Ha, ha, ha!!! Dave's all class.

Howabout we all collect some money so Dave can get some professional 'Manscaping' done and give his wife one night without using a toothpick after 'Womb Broom Maintanence'. It could be cut into the shape of an arrow.

[imported_shiola]

I'm all coded out!

I just added a new mod on the front page which lets you know who's been around in the last hour - this is probably what Switch meant in the first place.

There's a thing at the top of each post - Users browsing this topic:0 Registered, 0 Hidden and 0 Guests - but I don't think this is working as it permantently says '0' - has anyone ever seen anything except '0'? I think I need to double check that one.

Is that it people?!!!

[switchblade romance]

It is what I meant. Thanks for the mod. :D

[imported_shiola]

No worries. The time's and stuff are all screwey still though. That mod I added only tells you how many people visited per hour NOT per day.

I'm tempted to say fuck it, but I'm anal, so I'll try and fix it later.